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If your dog had a job, what would it be? Readers share their pup professions

Ever wonder what your dog would do if they had a 9-to-5? We recently asked readers to imagine their pup in the workforce—and their answers did not disappoint.

A dog with classes and a tie sits at a computer, ready for work.Fly_dragonfly/Getty

Ever wonder what your dog would do if they had a 9-to-5? We recently asked readers to imagine their pup in the workforce—and their answers did not disappoint.

💬 “My German Shepherd (working dog line) would be a professional soccer player,” wrote Susan Mayer. “There can never be enough pushing of balls or other rubber toys to me for me to then kick back to her—a game she invented as a puppy. She is expert at this game, obsessed with it, and she will play it forever if she could.”

Janie Parry summed up her dog’s profession in two words:
💬 “Private security!”

Some jobs were tailor-made for a dog’s natural talents.
💬 “GSD Luna: Border Patrol; GR Ike: Floor Cleaner.  No scrap left!; Cat Floyd: Neighborhood Supervisor,” said Cindi.

💬 “Nothing unique here. Food taster—everything even remotely organic needs to be sampled to ensure it is tasty and digestible,” said Mary Livingston, about her dog Skeeter.

💬 “First lady. Her name was Dolley Madison,” shared Cynthia Wilson.

Others leaned more into their dogs’ personalities:
💬 “Fun police. Anyone trying to have fun? Not on Dottie’s watch,” wrote @jessbenslyman.
💬 “Town crier,” said @thedandalorian_.
💬 “Nickels would be a ball girl. The one that fetches all the loose balls at tennis games,” said @racoonsareokay.
💬 “Unemployed,” joked @camb9813.
💬 “Puritan Backroom busboy,” wrote @danadepelteau, giving a shoutout to the popular Manchester restaurant.

Whether they’re chasing balls, sampling snacks, or maintaining law and order, it’s clear these dogs already know exactly what they were born to do.

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Colin Booth
Colin Booth Chief Political Correspondent
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